Things

I find it truly horrifying that my heart tries to find hope and security in the most frail pieces of property. I was feeling low because of the sink not working and acting rather moody about it and RV not coming together like it I would of liked it too (again my lazy mind and thinking everything in life should be easy). At the time though I didn't know that the RV was the reason why I was feeling the way that I did. I only knew I hated the way I felt, but I came home and it all changed. My roommate had went and fixed everything on my to do list. He sealed all the place that needed sealing, he put new filters in the A/C; everything! I felt joyful again, I was happy:). The only thing is, that this showed me something very scary about my heart. That my joy was dependent on the state of my house; when it was in disorder with a lot work to be done it weighted on my soul because I had put my joy and hope in it. The RV had became my mobile deity complete with leaky pipes. Pathetic polytheistic heart of mine, making gods out wood and metal. Where I went wrong was that I allowed this unhallowed object take place of the true hallowed as my source of joy and grief. That instead of being joyful in my salvation and grieving over my sin; I was mourning over a sink and joyful in an A/C filter.

This has really made me think; where does my hope come from? From time to time my pagan heart revisits me and stays for a day or two, but because my Father loves me he shows me my error and lovingly corrects me. So my hope continues in the Lord; not because I am able, but because He is.